A break in Florida with my people

The occasional vacating of your life, breaking away from routine, is a health benefit I think we can all get behind. It's even better when you spend your time away from normalcy with "your people." People who get you. People who share your interests. People you've known for a long, long time.

I'm fresh off a week spent with three distinct groups of people that others may not have enjoyed spending time with, but who made the trip extra special for me.

Group 1: Editors

Despite our reputation for being rule-abiding sticklers, boring introverts, and proud grammar Nazis, editors are actually a pretty fun group of people. (And let's not refer to us as grammar Nazis anymore—we've decided to use "grammando" instead. Come on, help me get this trending.)


ACES is a special conference. It's a place where I can get a "word nerd" pin and everyone around me covets it. Finding typos in PowerPoint presentations is a competition rather than something that just makes you roll your eyes (yes, typos wriggle their way even into editors' presentations). It's the best opportunity I have all year to commiserate with, learn from, and buddy up with people who understand what it's like to have a career dedicated to words. Half the world thinks we can be replaced with software, but we know there's more to our jobs than properly punctuating sentences. Editing is much more of an art than it is a science, and it involves far more people management than most people realize. But my people? They get it.


While last year editors were abuzz with the news that AP would lowercase "internet," this year was all about the partial acceptance of the singular "they" (the "they" that refers to someone who wishes to remain anonymous or who prefers "they" as their personal pronoun). Despite being in use for hundreds of years—even Shakespeare used the singular they!—and despite most editors being completely on board with adopting it fully, so many people are still clinging to the "it's not grammatically correct!" argument. But the fact is, language changes—even *gasp* the meaning of words—and nothing else has come anywhere close to filling the generic pronoun need. Most editors are going to keep fighting for singular they's complete acceptance, even if it means we'll have to pass the torch on to the next generation of editors.

This is from one of my favorite sessions—Kory Stamper's reading of her new book Word by Word: The Secret Life of Dictionaries. Kory makes my people look cool. (I'm in this picture, FYI. And I do not look cool.)

Chicago also finally took out the hyphen in email, but I guess that's not quite as exciting because that's what we've all been doing anyway. The announcement still got a pretty raucous cheer, though.

But lest you think editing conferences are full of happy friends who agree on everything, certain debates can get dicey. Particularly those between AP and Chicago frenemies.

The mug that inspired this picture says "4 Copy Editors Killed in Ongoing AP Style, Chicago Manual Gang Violence." Sorry, Nick, I'm pretty sure I'm winning. My Chicago sunglasses give me superpowers. And Chicago is better. Obviously.

And if you get to check out a bookstore and walk along a lovely beach with another one of your people, you count yourself very fortunate.

I was sad to see the first part of my trip end, but I consoled myself with the knowledge that my next "group" of people was on their way to pick me up.

Group 2: Mom and Dad

When I casually mentioned that I was going to make a stop at Harry Potter World while I was in Florida, my parents pulled out their phones and immediately started working out how they could meet me there. Before I could really process what was happening, we had a mini vacation planned, just the three of us.

Not everyone would be thrilled to hang out with their parents at an amusement park, but I've always liked my parents more than is really normal. And I think I'm old enough now that I don't have to be embarrassed by that anymore. Besides, my dad is super handy to have around for these types of things.

Group 3: Potterheads

My parents dropping everything to go to Harry Potter World for the third time should give you a little insight into why I am the way that I am. I wanted to fully immerse myself in the Harry Potter experience while I was at Universal, and my parents—and the bajillion other fans crammed into that little park—were 100% supportive of that. Of all the fandoms to be a part of, Harry Potter is one of the best.

Like every other witch and wizard, we started our journey to Hogwarts in London.

We tried to pay Sirius Black a visit, but for some reason he was out. 😭😭😭

So we proceeded to Diagon Alley. Walking through that busted brick wall is seriously like stepping into the movie. You're walking innocently along in the mundane Muggle world, and then BAM. You're in the wizarding world.

I was too intimidated by the goblins to ask for a withdrawal, but the ride was cool! I wish we had been able to go on it more than once, but it was broken down the second and third time we went back. I suspect nargles were involved.

After buying Sirius Black's wand (I now own seven wands—eight if you count my remote control wand), I was morally obligated to add something from  Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes to my ever-growing Harry Potter collection. I'm sure that U-No-Poo will come in handy at work. (Don't worry, guys—they're basically just M&M's.)

Then we had lunch at the Leaky Cauldron. I love saying that. I gave the cold Butterbeer a try, and it was tasty. But I still like the frozen Butterbeer better. Just don't drink them both in one day—you might get drunk from sugar.

The Hogwarts Express also feels like the real deal. Even standing in line at King's Cross Station is cool.

However, I was forced to take a brief break from being a wizard to figure out how to best word this sign so as to not confuse its American audience. I don't really know how to turn off my "edit" mode.

ANYWAY, back to Hogwarts. Dumbledore was nice enough to let me visit again.

This is the only part of the park where you remember you're not actually in Hogsmeade. The snow on the rooftops certainly looks cozy, but the effect isn't powerful enough to counteract the Florida heat.

I also tried to sneak into the Ministry of Magic,

but that was pushing my luck. Even Dumbledore couldn't persuade them to let me in.

And with that, the fantasy ended. Soon after, we left Harry's world behind.

The good feeling of being amongst my type of people disappeared the next morning when I was seated next to a lady with a cat on our five-hour flight home. But I guess I had it coming—the week leading up to that moment was perfect, so karma had to even things out a bit. (Luckily, my allergy shots are doing their job; otherwise, I would have been a sneezy mess of itchy misery the whole time.)

So, this year's word nerd vacation was a soaring success. Can't wait to see how next year turns out.

Word nerd vacation: The word nerd part

When I told people I was going to an editing conference, they would first look at me strangely, and then they would have to concentrate their efforts on keeping the look of incredulity from taking control of their face. Editors have conferences? What do they do—talk about commas for three days?

Yes, editors have conferences, just like every other nerd community. And while we certainly enjoy discussing commas (although we've learned to keep the serial comma debate to the minimum—it can get rather dangerous), editors touch so many parts of the writing/publication process and language changes so much that continuing education is a must.

But that's only a small justification for going to an editing conference. The real reason is so you can be surrounded by fellow word nerds. We're an interesting group; we care passionately about things normal people don't even think about. And when you're in the minority like that, it's soothing and rejuvenating to band together, whether it be to commiserate, learn from one another, or to just have a good time.

I joined the American Copy Editors Society (called ACES for short, which is just punny enough to be appropriate for its audience) last fall for all of these reasons. (Okay, and I wanted an excuse to go to Portland in the spring.)

Before the opening session even started, I knew I was in the right place. These were my people. They took the written word seriously. Laughed appreciatively at language-related jokes. Let out the loudest communal groan I've ever heard when this billboard was brought up:

Images of this sign in the hotel also circulated Twitter, with many wondering who the honored guest could be:

The big announcement of the event was that the AP Stylebook is going to start lowercasing Internet. This news was met with gasps and cheers—I kid you not, this is a huge deal in our world.

Each of us faced difficult decisions every day, with several intriguing sessions often claiming the same time slot. I took half a notebook of notes on freelancing, working with self-published authors, Microsoft Word tips, Google research tools, the future of copy editing, and more, drinking in the experience of being in a classroom environment again with other editors.

Everyone should belong to a group of similar nerds; it's good for the soul.

655 people registered for the conference. The role of the editor may be changing, but you can't make us disappear. (P.S. I'm in there somewhere—can you find me?)

But we weren't there to just work. Editors like their jobs, but we like to play too. And Portland was ready to deliver.

Stay tuned.

Everything your English teacher never told you

I feel like half my job as an editor is expunging grammar rules taught by English teachers who never bothered to read a usage manual written after 1820. Kids get to college knowing their teachers' grammar peeves by heart, but with little knowledge on how to write a thorough essay.

But that's a topic for another day . . .

In the freelance realm especially, people often come back to me with comments like, "But wait—I was taught that this was wrong."

Well, I'm here to tell you what your English teachers likely didn't:

• It's okay to end a sentence with a preposition.
• It's okay to split an infinitive.
• It's okay to start a sentence with a conjunction.
• You are probably capitalizing too much.
• Just use the singular they—those who are against it are losing the battle. 
• Ain't is too a word. (Although you probably shouldn't use it in anything remotely formal—the prejudice against this word is still very strong.)
• Language changes. It's not the end of the world.

The English language is nonsensical a lot of the time, which is why I refrain from grammar scolding. But lately, it's been the incorrectly taught rules that people stubbornly cling to that make me want to throw small objects and punch desks.

Some pet peeves

• The phrase "That's too funny!" How can something be too funny? Is there a limit to a person's threshold for funnyness? Will I explode if I accidentally read or hear something that crosses the appropriately funny line? Has "That's soooooooooooooooooo funny" gone out of style? Or is this just another example of ridiculous political correctness trying to appease .000037% of the population that gets some sick pleasure out of finding offense in everything that exists?*  
• When restaurants close at 9:00 p.m.
• When Thanksgiving is less than a month before Christmas.
• Jiffy Lube.
• When people are too busy complaining about the cold and the snow to appreciate the magic of a winter wonderland. If you're one of those people, please move to Mexico.
• When someone hands me candy instead of chocolate.
• When BYU basketball games take place before 5:00 p.m. on weekdays.
• When musicians record one song, insert a ginormous break, and then record another song, all in the same track. WHY DO THEY DO THIS? IT MAKES NO SENSE.
• When you work on a day most people take off and email is down.

*It's probably just one of those unexplainable language phenomenons caused by airheads.

What I wish everyone knew about formatting text

• The underline is so 1980s.
• As in, there's no place for it.
• Seriously, don't underline text.
• If you need to emphasize something, use bold or italics.
• Never use both, like this.
• All-caps are okay, but only in very small doses.
• If you do this, you'll just look excessively ridiculous. 
• And then people will mock you on their blogs.

The author realizes it's a bit of a stretch to include a post on formatting in a series dedicated to boldness. But it's Friday. You understand.

The ups and downs of freelance

One of the things that has always attracted me about a career in writing and/or editing is the freedom it gives you to choose your own hours and workplace. What could be better than working at home in your pajamas?

However, I'm not quite as excited about the prospect of doing freelance work as I once was. It would just be so much easier to have a 9–5 job where I showed up every day, did my work, and then went home. Freelance work requires a lot more patience and motivation—you have to actually abide by the hours you set, and a lot of the time (at least for beginners like me) you have to risk not being paid much for awhile in order to work your way up. I have a very hard time getting myself to do something if I don't know exactly what's in it for me—this is the biggest reason why I want a stable, full-time job.

Unfortunately, the search for a full-time job has been a bit of waste of time to say the least, so I have been putting forth more of an effort to find freelance work. And believe me, it's not a whole lot better than searching for a "real" job.

However, I did make a few breakthroughs during the month of November. I applied for a copywriter position in Provo and, typically, was their second choice, so they decided to keep me on as a freelancer. I've only done one project so far, and I'm starting to doubt that I'll get another one because it's been a few weeks, but it was exciting to negotiate a pay rate that was worthy of someone with a degree.

In addition, I also found a job as a writer at Examiner.com. I found several websites that hire freelance writers, and Examiner.com was the most popular one for the search engines. I was flipping through the openings in the religion section, and was delighted to find one entitled "Narnia, Hobbits, and Christianity," which is basically what my senior capstone class at BYU was all about. I never dreamed that I would ever actually make a profit off what I learned in that class, but it seemed like I had found a possibility. So I applied, submitted one of my analysis papers from the class, and waited.

A few weeks later, I got an email from Examiner.com saying that they wanted me to be the "Christian Speculative Fiction Examiner" for the Provo area. While a little sad that I wouldn't be writing about Narnia and hobbits all the time, I was pretty excited to get such a long job title. It makes it sound a lot more important than it really is. I've spent the last few days figuring out how the system works, and I think I am going to give it a try.

Here is where you all come in: most of the money I can make is generated from traffic, session length, and publishing frequency. So while I still have no idea how much money I could actually make off of this little column, I decided to try it out because (1) I need something to do, and (2) I am running out of money. It's time to take desperate measures. And, if any of you would like to write about your area of expertise on Examiner.com, there is a referral program and I get 50 bucks for each person I bring along . . .

So, the URL to my page is http://www.examiner.com/christian-speculative-fiction-1-in-salt-lake-city/angela-carter. Really long, I know, so thank goodness for the copy-and-paste function. This is very much an experiment and if anyone has any questions or suggestions, I would greatly appreciate any help I can get.

I apologize in advance if you get sick of reading my stuff. :) And to prove my sincerity, I am going to log off now and do something that doesn't involve thinking or begging. Farewell.