31 things I'd rather do than get up at 5:30 a.m.

A combination of my usual restless Sunday night of sleep, waking up and leaving the house before the sun deigned to show itself, and a warmish shower have left me in quite a charming mood this morning. I can think of a lot of things I would rather do than get up at the horrible hour of 5:30.

1. Wear heels.
2. Go on a date with Mr. Collins.
3. Eat a pickle.
4. Listen to Sugarland for 5 minutes.
5. Watch The Nightmare Before Christmas.
6. Ride the ferris wheel 50 times.
7. Become president of the United States.
8. Go visiting teaching.
9. Get Jimmered.
10. See snow in July.
11. Deliver pizza to Payson Fruit Growers.
12. Get a really bad sunburn.
13. Go back to school and get a degree in chemistry.
14. Donate my Harry Potter books to charity.
15. Endure an entire day without a drink of milk.
16. Go to Vegas.
17. Stand in a field of hay during allergy season.
18. Answer the phone when the caller ID says "Toll Free."
19. Let an insure/ensure mixup slide.
20. Replace the headlight in my car.
21. Drive uphill during a blizzard.
22. Watch a 6-hour golf tournament.
23. Wear fake eyelashes that curl all the way to my eyebrows.
24. Read crap written by the Beat generation.
25. Write a poem.
26. Skip lunch.
27. Root for the Lakers.
28. Go an entire week without chocolate.
29. Work and entire day for free.
30. Ride "It's a Small World" at Disneyland.
31. Sympathize with an attention-seeking person.

Don't quote me on any of this. It is highly possible that my irrational emotions are causing me to exaggerate slightly.