Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Exodus 14:13–14

During my sophomore year in college, I came across the following scripture:

"Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord. . . . the Lord will fight for you."

It inspired me so much that I wrote it down on a stickie note and placed it on my wall by my bed, right by my Dove Chocolate wrappers. (I am such a creative decorator.) However, I didn't write down the reference, so I didn't know what the context was, who was talking to whom, and what the ellipses were omitting.

A few days ago, a ran across that scripture during my nightly scripture reading. I was quite excited; I was beginning to think that someone had just made the scripture up. It is in Exodus 14:13–14, and the full references says the following:

"And Moses said unto the people, Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will shew to you to day: for the Egyptians whom ye have seen to day, ye shall see them again no more for ever. The Lord shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace."

Following this statement, the Lord parted the Red Sea. He did the impossible to protect his children.

I have never had much patience for the children of Israel. All they did was complain. God performed miracle after miracle, and yet they were still like children who were incapable of thinking about anyone other than themselves. I always found comfort in the fact that I would never act like that; I would trust God and do what I was told without whining incessantly about it.

But, am I really any better than they? These past few months of being jobless has really tested my trust and faith in God. I have so many wonderful things in my life, so many small miracles, and yet I still complain when one thing in my life still won't right itself. It is really hard to fight against the hopelessness and depression that comes with being unemployed. I almost think it would be easier if I did have a family to support; at least then my life would have meaning. So I have been learning to rely on the Lord more than ever—and yet I still doubt his power. I still can't bring myself to fully believe that God will fight for me, even though I know he has been there with me every step of the way.

I know that it doesn't really matter where or when I start working. There are much more meaningful and important things I will do with my life. But right now, it is important to me. And I've hit a pretty big dead end. I've done all I can do—now it's up to God to do the rest. And honestly, it's been really hard putting my trust in him rather than in myself. It just seems wrong to just sit around while I wait for a miracle to happen. But obviously, my work alone just isn't cutting it.

But I don't want to be like the children of Israel, so I am just going to push aside my fears and "stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord." He'll fight for me. I have never doubted that he has the power to do so, just whether or not he will use that power for my benefit. So I guess it's time to put aside those doubts and wait for my Red Sea to be parted.

And while I wait, I will be at peace.

1 comment:

  1. I <3 this. Angie - you rock. And are a much more patient individual than I have yet succeeded in being.